You can sing. You know it and anyone within 100 yards of your shower knows it. You've got talent! All you need now is a large audience, a band, odd groupies and you can call yourself a popstar.

Follow this simple guide and get all of it (well, nearly all of it - not sure about the groupies) NOW!

The first thing you need to do is to kidnap a band. That's right! Kidnap them! Having a band usually involves years of rehearsals, agents, and ego trips. It will slow you down by a good decade so we recommend that you avoid all of it and kidnap yourself a million-dollar, brilliant, professional and rehearsed band from one of your CDs or Mp3s.

All you have to do is replace their singer with someone far more qualified and beautiful: YOU!

Grab yourself a copy of Music Morpher Gold. This program will remove the vocals from just about any recording while keeping the backing band pristine. It also comes with a complete recording studio so you can record your new, improved vocals and burn it to CD or upload it to an audience of millions on the Internet.